


Will You Be My Valentine?

by ClairesGuiltyPleasure



Series: Valentine's 2021 [5]
Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: Love Letters, M/M, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 16:00:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29298540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ClairesGuiltyPleasure/pseuds/ClairesGuiltyPleasure
Summary: Writing letters just seems to be easier than saying the words out loud.
Relationships: Thomas Barrow/Jimmy Kent
Series: Valentine's 2021 [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2143710
Comments: 2
Kudos: 26
Collections: Well I love you: Valentines for Thomas Barrow





	Will You Be My Valentine?

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt 5. "I hate Valentine's Day." "You only say that because you never get any cards."

It was freezing outside. In fact, it was so cold that the blasted car stopped working so Jimmy and Thomas were sent to the village to get the groceries for Mrs. Patmore, because of course they were. Carson wouldn’t send his precious Alfred and the hall boys were too irresponsible in the butler’s eyes. Not that Thomas disagreed.

The shop windows, Thomas noticed, were displaying a concerning amount of pink and red items, more often than not heart shaped. It was that time of the year again.

“I hate Valentine’s Day,” he told Jimmy.

“You only say that because you never get any cards.”

“That’s true, but that’s not it.

“What is then?” Jimmy asked.

“It reminds me even more of how different I am and how hated by society. They’d see Anna and Bates strolling down the street, hand in hand, making eyes at each other and they would applaud them and congratulate them for being in love. If that were me, having another bloke on my arm, no matter how in love we were, they’d call police on us, call us unnatural freaks. As if their love was somehow more important, as if we didn’t even have the right to feel such a pure emotion.”

“Oh. I don’t think that. You know that, right? I might’ve thought so years ago, because I didn’t know better, but I know you and I know there’s nothing evil about your love, I understand that now. You deserve love Thomas, perhaps more than anyone else.”

“Thank you, Jimmy. It means a lot.” And it did. Especially from Jimmy. Because Jimmy must’ve known how Thomas felt about him. Thomas was sure Jimmy knew he still loved him.

“So, is it true that you never get cards?”

“Mostly. I’ve never gotten a card from a man. I got a few from some girls, Daisy the most recent.”

“Daisy? Our Daisy?” Jimmy was genuinely surprised.

“Yes. What’s so unbelievable about it? I’m very charming after all,” Thomas smirked.

“Sure, you are.”

“I wasn’t fair to her though. I lead her on, took her to fairs and pictures. I was trying to get at William, the other footman. I knew he fancied her, but she fancied me, so I had a bit of fun. The others didn’t approve; they all liked William more than me.”

“How did it end?” Jimmy enquired.

“Daisy married William. She didn’t want to, mind, but she was pressured into it.”

“So, Daisy is married?”

“Was. William died hours after the wedding. He was wounded in the war. The whole affair was rather sad, really.”

“Oh. Was she in love with him?”

“She cared about him, she did. But I don’t think it was love, at least not the kind you’re supposed to feel when you marry somebody. I think she saw him more as a friend.”

“Have you ever loved somebody that way?”

“I think that for that kind of love, you need both of the people to feel that way, that part of your love is the assurance that the other person loves you just as much. So, no. But I’ve come rather close, I think.”

“Who’d have thought you’re such a romantic,” Jimmy chuckled.

“Well, not that it got me anywhere. What about you then?”

“I haven’t loved many people in my life. Fancied, yes, but I have never loved a girl that way,” Jimmy confessed. It was more or less what Thomas expected.

*

Thomas groaned when he woke up. He remembered the maids giggling yesterday evening, making eyes at the boys, and whispering together about who is going to get a card from whom. Thomas had a headache even just from remembering it. He was about to get dressed for the day, when he noticed a small piece of paper lying on his floor, near the door. It was folded like a letter, but not sealed. His Christian name was written on it.

_Your smile is one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. I wish you would smile more, because when you do, your whole face lights up. I hope I could be the reason for your smiles._

No name, no nothing. Still, Thomas was pleased. He wasn’t as vain as Jimmy, but it never hurt to be complimented. And besides, the note was rather sweet. It was probably from one of those giggling maids though, so nothing would come from it.

His spirits lifted a bit, he went to the servants’ hall for breakfast. Jimmy was late as usual, the Bateses were making eyes at each other more obviously than normally and Mrs. Hughes had to raise her voice to calm the maids.

Thomas wasn’t really paying attention to the post, at least until a letter was handed to him. It looked the same as the one on his floor. Even the handwriting was the same. He quickly put it into his breast pocket before anyone could ask him about it. He opened it sometime later when he was enjoying his first cigarette of the day.

_I wish I could look into your eyes the whole day. No matter how much you’ve mastered the art of not letting emotion show on your face, your eyes always tell the truth. People just don’t notice, but I see the relief when you take the first drag of your cigarette or the pride when Mrs. Hughes speaks highly of you. I love your eyes because they let me get to know who you really are._

Thomas wasn’t sure how he felt about that one. It was nice that somebody was taking the effort to watch him closely, on the other hand it could mean potential danger, if the person can really read him as well as they claim to do.

“Saw you got a letter in the post,” Jimmy said as he came to stand next to Thomas.

“Did you now?”

“Is it a Valentine’s card?” Jimmy wanted to know.

“It is,” Thomas nodded.

“Well, who is it from?” Jimmy sounded excited.

“It’s not signed. It must be somebody from the house because it wasn’t sealed. But wasn’t a love confession or anything, so calm your horses. I’m sure you got a few yourself?”

“I did, yes. Not that it matters, I don’t fancy any of them.”

The day went on as usual. Only it wasn’t usual for Thomas. He kept finding new letters. On his chair at the table,

_Here, at this table is the first time I see you in the morning. You are so beautiful. You always look so composed and put together and I want nothing more than to see you dishevelled and be the cause of that, too._

in his smoking spot,

_I dream about your hands sometimes. I imagine how they would feel in my hair and against my body, how fast would your fingers undo my buttons… It is good that I don’t blush easily because otherwise I would turn red every time you smoke or hold your teacup._

in his newspaper,

_It’s not just your looks that I love about you. Many think you’re evil and foul because of who you are, but they are wrong. You are kind, and strong, and brave. You’re the bravest of them all. And you are always true to yourself, no matter what._

in the afternoon post,

_I love the was your hair falls into your eyes sometimes, after a long day. I find endearing how annoyed you get by it, but you give up on fixing it soon. I want to rake my hands through it and feel if it is really as silky soft as I imagine._

and in the boot room under his jacket that he took off before cleaning his Lordship’s shoes.

_I think of you all the time, I cherish every moment I get to spend with you and I never want to be apart from you. I’d follow you anywhere._

He was thinking about who the mysterious admirer was, but after he thoroughly examined all the letters, there was only one answer that made any sense. After dinner, all the couples, old or newly formed, left, leaving just a few people in the room, and nobody in Thomas and Jimmy’s corner.

“So, how many hearts did you break today?” Thomas asked.

Jimmy shrugged. “They all know I’m not interested. Or should know, anyway.”

“I should thank you for the letters. They got me through today,” Thomas silently begged he was right.

“How did you know I wrote them?” Jimmy asked.

“You just told me,” Thomas smirked.

“Well. I’m glad you liked them,” Jimmy stood up and made to leave. “And Mr. Barrow? I meant everything I wrote,” he said and was gone.

Thomas blinked, dumbfounded. He thought Jimmy was trying to lift his spirits at best, make fun of him at worst. He still contemplated the whole situation as he made his way to his room. Upon entering, he noticed one more letter laying on his bed. He eagerly picked it up.

_I was wrong. I can give you what you wanted; I know that now. If you still do want it, come, and get it._

Thomas could feel himself smile wide, happiness spreading through his whole body as he made his way across the hall to Jimmy’s room.


End file.
